Flash Gordon, BATSLAYER!

This morning I woke up and things seemed a bit off. First, Douglas did not have a pillowcase on his pillow. Half asleep, I asked him, "Where's your pillowcase?" To which he replied, "Oh, it had something on it." I accepted the answer and went about my business. I got out of bed and made my way to the bathroom, passing my blue fuzzy robe along the way. "Why is my robe in the floor?" I asked myself. It is way too hot for my fuzzy robe; I haven't worn it all weekend. Still, I go about my business like all is well. Finally, I made it downstairs, where I discovered my second bathrobe. Okay, now I started to worry. Either Yoshi is stronger than I think, and has for some reason, pulled both bathrobes off their rightful hook and drug one downstairs, or Dug Bear dresses in my robes and prances around the house at night whilst I sleep and has forgotten to return his getup. Both scenarios seemed highly unlikely, but you never know, I reckon. Anyway, I decided I'd just wait until Doug woke up to question him.

Fast forward about an hour. Doug awakes. "Why is my bathrobe downstairs, and why is the

other one in the floor, and why are you missing a pillowcase?" "Funny story," he says, "last night Flashy saved your life. I was laying here watching Dr. Who and Flash started acting all crazy. He was running around the room, pacing back and forth, acting wild, and ferociously meowing. Then, I heard a chirping, "Chirp chirp chirp." I flipped on the light to see what was the matter. THERE WAS A BAT CIRCLING ABOVE OUR ROOM. 'What's my plan of action,' I thought . 'Should I wake you?' No, that would obviously be a mistake and would only make the situation worse. So, I tried to capture the bat...with your bathrobes. The bat was too quick for the bathrobes, so I resorted to pillows. I swung lightly the first couple of times, but that was getting me nowhere, so I had to get mean about it. I swung hard and hit it. I didn't see where it went, but Flashy was on top of him. I then got....your bathrobe...and wrapped up the bat and took him outside and released him. All this time you were sleeping soundly. You moved once and I thought you were going to wake up. I can only image your horror at awakening to such a scene: me and Flash fighting rabis-ridden winged rats with your bathrobe and a pillow."

I am so glad I am a heavy sleeper. I screamed when Douglas told me this story.

***NOTE: When finding a picture for this blog, I had to google "cartoon bat." I could not handle the real thing, not even in pictures.