Take Your Top Off

Let me first start off by wishing everyone a most happy Halloween! I hope that you get to eat lots of
candy tonight!

Now, let’s move onto bigger, more important topics:

I hate that Joe’s Crab Shack commercial for…you know what, I don’t even know what they are advertising. At any rate, in this commercial, the waiter brings out these dudes’ and dudette’s plates of food and this wise guy hollers to the chick, “Take your top off!” She looks at him as to say, “WTF?!” And he repeats, “Take your top off!” Oh, right, hahaha, the comment is regarding the plate cover! Oh, I get it! How hilarious! NOT. How stupid. You know what this commercial puts me in mind of? Creepy dudes. Yes, this commercial is like when a creepy dude who is your “friend” says something to you that could be a joke, but you’re not really sure if it is a joke, and if you were to take it seriously, he’d totally be bout it bout it (yes, that is a Master P reference, I wonder if I used it correctly). For example, say you are sitting around in class and this creepster starts laughing and says to you, “You know what would be great? Oh, this would be hilarious. What if we made out and told people we were dating!?” And the creepster totally wants to make out but he says it this way because you will most likely reject him. Anyway, I hate that commercial.

Do you watch New Girl? If you don’t, you should. It is hilarious. Schmidt is the funniest character. I
hadn’t watched a single episode of the current season until Saturday morning. I had a mini-marathon.
Well, in one episode I watched, Nick was asking Schmidt if he believed in time travel, and if he (Nick)

knew how he (Schmidt) was going to die, would he (Schmidt) want to know. To which Schmidt replied that he already knew how he was going to die---one of his moles was going to kill him. This cracked me up because I also think that I will also be murdered by one of my moles. I get them checked at the dermatologist, but I just know one of these bastards is going to kill me someday. I hope Julian and Jonas are spared the Cornett moles, but they probably won’t be.

If I am not taken out by a mole, it’ll probably be by some un-secured piece of junk flying off the back of someone’s truck or car roof. I have a great fear of this. I know Codar finds this fear of mine hilarious, and has been known to make me watch YouTube videos of crap flying off of trucks and killing innocent bystanders. Why, Codar, why? I avoid cars and trucks that haul stuff. I pass them on the interstate. I go incredibly slow and let them get really far ahead of me in instances where passing is not an option (i.e., southeastern Kentucky). I mean, can you really trust that the redneck in front of you hauling his queen-sized mattress on the top of his corolla really locked down his cargo with that one piece of twine? No, thank you. I’m passing that fool.

I cannot see an “Inspected by ##” sticker on my clothes without thinking of Little Pete from the

Adventures of Pete and Pete. That is all.