Brother Fight

It's been awhile since I've posted about a brother fight (or anything at all for that matter). This brother fight is sure to make you laugh, and maybe evoke sympathy for a little dude who is usually the instigator of such rumbles: Jonas.

The fight of the day is brought to you buy a dishwasher box, a club house so cool it simply cannot be shared.

When I was taking these pictures, I actually thought the dudes were playing. Upon review, they clearly were not.

A Third Story in Pictures (And a Few Captions)

I love playing with my walking toy!

I said it was MY toy, brother!

That's right. Mine! Hey, wait! Are you in MY house?

I thought I told you once, "That's my house, punk!"

Mommy! Joe is so mean!!

Another Story in Pictures (with a Few Captions)

Yay! I'm such a happy little bear!

Look, Mom--One hand!

Oh, I love having a brother to play with!

Except when he's in my house! That's my house, punk!

It's Been Too Long

It seems like forever since I last wrote a blog post. I've been in this sort of daze lately thanks to work. Lots of hours writing boring documents and no time for writing fun things. But tonight I finished my work early (ie, before 11), so thought I'd get a quick post in to catch up.

Pause for momentary barf fest: GAG A MAGGOT. There's a commercial on television with Louisville fans talking about how awesome it was to win the National Championship. Ugh. 

Anyway, the boys are wild men. They can clap their hands. Pull themselves up. Jonas can high-five. Julian can push his walking toy all by himself. They've eaten french fries, macaroni and cheese, chicken, and zucchini fritters in addition to their usual food items. They got their first pair of walking shoes! AND, they went swimming. I figured the dudes would like swimming because they have an absolute blast in the tub, but I sure never expected them to love swimming as much as they did. I am serious when I say they laughed the ENTIRE time we were in the pool. Check out the youtube video if you need proof. Ignore my goofy self splashing around like an idiot (evidently, splashing is hilarious).

Is it just me, or are the people of Covington looking more like the cast of The Walking Dead (the walkers) every damn day? They must've had a rough winter because they are looking haggard, man.

A Tragedy

The other night while I was upstairs rocking the boys to sleep, I had a brilliant idea: I'll make rice krispie treats when I go back downstairs. As soon as the boys were dreaming, I headed for the kitchen. Had my butter melting and took off for the pantry to get my marshmallows. As I was carrying them to the kitchen, I noticed that they were sort of hard. I looked at the best by date and it read May 2012. Immediately my heart shattered. No rice krispie treats. After the hurt, I went to anger. Naturally, Doug was to blame for this. Instead of buying me fresh marshmallows like I asked, I knew he just drug those out of the pantry in an attempt to teach me a lesson about being wasteful. I yell at him for this. Um, yeah, that wasn't what happened. He did buy me "fresh" marshmallows at Kroger. However, Kroger must not have cleaned their dang shelves for the past year because they sold the man some year-old brick-like mallows. I know it was you Latonia Kroger. You broke my heart! You broke my heart!

Last week's recipe: Adella's Dirt Cake.

My friend Adella sent me a recipe that is known as her signature dish. She found the recipe when she was in high school. It was just lying in her seat one day waiting for her, knowing that someday it would be shared with me. 

Ingredients
1 pkg Oreos
2 boxes instant vanilla pudding
1 pkg cream cheese
1 cup powdered sugar
12 oz bowl of Cool Whip
1/2 cup butter
Milk for pudding
Directions per Adella: First, make the instant pudding according to box directions. Second, in the absolute most huge bowl you own combine softened cream cheese, powdered sugar, butter, and Cool Whip. After pudding has set, add it in to the huge bowl. Mix well. In a large pan do 1 layer of crushed Oreos. Start with a layer of Oreos, 1 full row is what I do, then layer on half the mixture, then another layer or Oreos, the other half of your mixture, and top it off with a last layer of Oreos. Let it chill for at least 3 hours, but I like to have 6 just so it's good and cold.

Brother Fights

They were fighting over nothing in particular. Just felt like rumbling, I reckon.

Joe putting Julian in the Figure 4.

Be still, Joe, and let me climb over your face to get to this toy.

News?, Banana-less Banana Pudding, and A Tooth

Beetle and Jonas

Am I the only person on the planet who hadn't heard of Jodi Arias? Probably so. Well, never fear. My Grandmother (Beetle) filled me in on the whole ordeal this weekend. You know how she loves Nancy Grace and the HLN channel. I believe I've told you before, but let me say it again, my little Beetle is hilarious. She is also a closet cusser. That is, she likes to say cuss words, but only when she is repeating someone else (she's the best storyteller). Anyway, I've heard her say a few bad words, but never did I ever think I would hear my 81-year-old Grandmother say the words, "anal sex." That's right, people. Evidently, this nutty woman, Jodi Arias, according to Beetle (and therefore Nancy Grace and company) got religion in the midst of her relationship with the poor guy she allegedly murdered. Her religion (through her eyes) told her that the normal horizontal polka was wrong, but the backward horizontal polka? was a-okay, so that's what they did. Good grief! Tell me why again does anyone watch the "news?"

Oh yeah, Beetle also told me that this Jodi was an artist. "What kind of art does she do?" I asked, not that I cared. Beetle said, "Well, one day, she was sitting in court just doodling around, and when she showed what she had drawn, it was a penis."

How do I follow-up the post after writing about that awful mess? 

Let's talk about my latest new recipe: banana pudding. I actually made it for the first time a couple of weeks ago before I started my new recipe challenge, but I made it again this weekend and am counting it. You know, I thought I was weird, but the more I talk to people, the more I see that I am not the only person who thinks banana pudding would be so much better without the bananas. In this pudding, I used: 1 block of cream cheese (beat this first, then add...), 1 box instant vanilla pudding, 3 cups milk, 1 can sweetened condensed milk. Mix all of that, then fold in 1 tub of cool whip. Lastly, layer vanilla wafers, bananas, pudding until you're all out of goodness. Put it in the fridge to chill, then serve. Make sure you make a giant batch of it because once it is gone, your Uncle Bob will not recover. You'll hear, "I sure wish I had some of that banana pudding left. Ain't there anymore in the fridge?"

By the way, Beetle said that Troy Austin's (my Grandpa's brother) favorite dessert was chocolate pudding and vanilla wafers. Mmm. Might have to add that to my repertoire. However, I insist on cooking my chocolate pudding. It has to be warm. 

Tonight as I rocked Julian to sleep, I thought about my future children. I thought maybe I'd like to have the next baby in October, a nice fall month. Then I thought, if I have a baby in October, that basically kills basketball season for me. How am I to attend 20 ballgames at Rupp with a new baby? It wouldn't be possible. 

BROTHER FIGHT UPDATE:

We went to Dwarf this weekend for a visit, and I thought we were actually going to leave Combs Branch without witnessing a brother fight. The boys were so good. They shared! They settled for toys that they didn't have to steal from their brother. It was very impressive. But this morning, it all went to heck. Over an empty kleenex box. You heard me right, friend. An empty kleenex box brought Jonas to tears...or maybe it was Julian's fist to his head that brought Jonas to tears. I was in the kitchen getting breakfast ready, and I hear Uncle Anthony hollering, "Don't kill your brother, man!" And then they crying began. Poor dude. Ant took the box and ripped it in half, and gave a piece to each bro. Kids and boxes. Just like cats.

ALSO...Jonas has a tooth! Today the boys turn 10 months old, and a tooth is finally poking through. Hide ya fingers!

Boy Fights

As you saw from A Story in Pictures (And a Few Captions), my little dudes like to duke it out with each other. I know I probably shouldn't laugh, but it seriously is a hilarious site to see. I have a feeling that I am going to be breaking up fights for the rest of my life. So, in honor of the return of Arrested Development, and because I get such joy out of it, I have decided to start documenting these brother fights. Now, I won't go so far as George Bluth and provoke the dudes, but I sure will laugh and share these moments with you.

May 11, 2013.

The boys started to get a little cranky, which generally means 1 of 3 things: they're hungry, they're sleepy, or they're hungry and sleepy. A good fix to this is a couple of bottles. I went to the kitchen to whip them up a little snack, and as I exited the room, I said, "Boys, I've got to go make your bottle. Try not to kill each other while I'm gone." They didn't. They wanted to wait until I got back so I could watch. I gave each dude his bottle and they kicked back in their boppies and twiddled their hair and tried to catch some zzz's. Well, at least Julian tried. Jonas decided that his bottle didn't suit him, so he pitched it to the side, crawled over to Julian, and politely ripped Julian's bottle from his hands. He then proceeded to sit up and drink the bottle right in front of Jules. What else can a man do but kick the tar out of the bottle thief? Jules began kicking his brother, but Jonas didn't mind. Even when his little body was scooting across the floor as Jules pushed with all of his might.

May 12, 2013.
Julian and his mighty strength picked up the ballcano and dumped it onto his brother. In a fit of

rage, Jonas retaliated by grabbing Julian by the hair and yanking him to the ground. Not to be outdone, Julian then grabbed a handful of Jonas's face and yanked. Crying ensued. I had to swoop in and rescue the babies; quickly resolving all issues by reading, "Cuddles the Cow," their favorite book at the moment.

I'm Cuddles the Cow. I eat straw and hay. I sit on the grass almost all day. My little baby is called a calf. I tickle his nose to make him laugh. (Then I have to tickle their little noses. That's their favorite part--and mine, too!)

Stay tuned for more brother fights!