Lt. Dan, Ice Cream. Lt. Dan, Iiiiice Cream

Butter pecan, my favorite!

I'm glad Doug wasn't up here just now to see me lick chocolate off of my shirt. He told me earlier today that I had enough ice cream bar sticks on my nightstand to build a cabin. I can't help it that Haagen-Dazs makes a mighty fine chocolate-almond crunch ice cream bar, can I? I mean, who wouldn't want to lick that off a shirt? Give me a break, dude.

My nightly ice cream bar reminds me of my Pappaw and old Barksdale Cornett (the family dog, as you recall). When he wasn't enjoying a big tub of popcorn**, Pap

Pappaw's college yearbook photo.

delighted in a eating a cup of ice cream. After he had polished it off, he'd let Barksdale lick the cup. A match made in Heaven. In fact, I bet they're up in Heaven right now, maybe even sharing some butter pecan.

Speaking of butter pecan, I may have shared this story with you before, but one of my favorite memories of my Pappaw involved a trip to Lexington and a stop at Baskin Robbins. Now, we didn't have any ice cream shops in Dwarf, so when I was presented with the opportunity to pick from all those delicious-looking flavors of ice cream, I went wild. However, I was a dumb kid, and I chose bubblegum ice cream. It was pink and had pink chiclets buried inside. Also, it was inedible. I took one bite of that sickness and immediately knew that I had made a horrible, disgusting decision. Pappaw must've seen the sadness in my eyes because he asked me if I wanted to switch ice creams. What a man! He forced that bubblegum crap down while I enjoyed his delicious scoop of butter pecan.

**I can't wait until the dudes are old enough to eat popcorn. We'll eat it every night! Oh, how I loved staying all night with Mommaw and Pappaw! I knew as soon as Wheel of Fortune came on, Pap would be in the kitchen making a giant bowl of popcorn (always making sure I got my portion in a special bowl). Mmm I can smell it now.

Bob Dylan, Oreos, Possums, and the Alphabet

Every time I hear Bob Dylan's Don't Think Twice It's All Right, my mind travels back to Manchester, Tennessee. It was the middle of summer and hotter than hellfire. As soon as we arrived, I thought, "What have I done?" A camping festival? With hippies? Certainly I did not PAY for this, right? But there I was, and one of the main reasons I had gone was to see Bob Dylan. I suffered through the heat, filth, and random naked stoners and finally the day arrived. My buddies and I made it over to the stage where Bob was to perform. We landed ourselves a great seat and settled in for a fantastic show. Ugh, but the hippies. Bob started to sing Don't Think Twice, and this goofy kid with a Sonny Bono haircut started dancing around like he's in a freaking mosh pit. "Goodbye's too good a word, babe, so I'll just say..." "YOU'LL SAY, 'FARE THEE WELL,' BOB. FARE THEE WELL!!!" If the song wasn't so awesome, that guy could've totally ruined it for me.

Let's move on.

My child is an addict. That's right, folks. Julian needs Oreos like he needs air. The

other day, I received a text from Kay (our babysitter):

Julian wouldn't eat his mac-n-cheese and green beans. I asked him what he wanted and he pointed at the bar and said, "Cook!"

Another thing that kid can't live without is his possum. I wish you could see him with this thing. He loves it! Every night when we walk into his room, he marches over to his bed and gets his possum. When we went to my Grandma's a few weeks ago, I jotted down a list of items not to forget:

Toothbrushes

Deodorant

Sippy cups

Julian's possum

As for the other dude, The Bear's new thing is walking around with a blanket over his head. He thinks this is hysterical. When he's not being a goof, he's being a genius. The kid scares me. He knows the following letters: B, O, K, Y, T, and S. He refuses to eat with utensils, but kid can identify some letters.

One more thing before I go...could someone please explain to me how the spawn of the man who created The Muppets, Sesame Street, Fraggle freaking Rock, and Dinosaurs bring to life such a horrendous show as Sid the Science Kid? Poor Jim Henson, having his name associated with such refuse.

Terrifying.

Toys at the Table

He can't fathom eating food with a fork or a spoon, but a dump truck he'll do.

The Art of Eating an Oreo

THE JONAS METHOD: You eat the icing first. Very carefully scraping off each nugget of goodness with your index finger and promptly licking it off.

 THE JULIAN METHOD: All the goodness all at once!